Tumble

Quick flip
Slidding
Anger to no where

Pulling & pushing
Letting go
Hanging on

Self-manipulation
Pain, fear
Tiredness

Inadequacy
Confusion of where and how
Questions, endless questions

Exhaustive worrying
Punishment
Challenges in never-ending cycle

The past's shadow lingering
Why?
Other's voices, judgments

Dreams & Visions
Rock bottom
Push upwards, can't fall further

Shove, losing mental grip
Hands holding you
Blinkered

Surrender

I was asked to surrender today
My mind took up arms and was ready to fight
Surrender? Everything for nothing?
Keep control, keep going

No.
Stop.
Breathe.

I was asked to surrender today
Not to give up, not to walk away
But to notice all my places of fear
And simply surrender to them

Struggle.
Anger and panic.
Fighting for control.

I was asked to surrender today.
Notice the places where I am holding pockets of negative energy
To stop and raise the white flag
Let the river carry me, to let go of the cage that I have put myself in

Tears.
Silent and slow leaked from my eyes.
My eyelashes trying to hold them back.

I was asked to surrender today
What a beautiful idea that is
To hold yourself and embrace your journey
To let yourself walk beside you rather than blocking your path

Surprise
Release and clarity.
Calm.

I was asked to surrender today
That line circling my head
Chasing the control out, making way for the joy
Making way for the chaos
Beginning my journey